The Purpose of Sex

There is a scriptural principle in biblical research called, "the law of first mentioned". The law of first mention is said to be the principle that requires one to go to that portion of the Scriptures where a doctrine is mentioned for the first time and to study the first occurrence of the same in order to get the fundamental inherent meaning of that doctrine. With that in mind, let's talk about the purpose of sex. (God gave us this wonderful way of sharing, to be sure we are on the same page - God's page.) The Bible refers to Adam "knowing" his wife. Jacob went into to Leah and knew her. Judah never "knew" Tamar again. This use of the word "knowing" and "knew" means they were intimately acquainted or had a sexual encounter. God's original intent for sex was in and from the beginning has not changed...It was for marriage between a man and a woman. 

Sex was given to a couple - a male and female. They were created in God's image for His glory. First the male, then the woman from man for as his glory. He gave sex to man for woman and woman for man. His purpose was to bring one into the other; to know the other intimately, to manifest God (make-create love - God is love) in marriage. It is for the purpose of reproducing and that (re)production is after their own kind. It is a form of worship. I know for some that is a deep thought, but it is truth.

Why? How is it worship? When we are married, we make love.  We literally create God because God is love. If we consider this as singles, we may rethink entering into sexual encounters with those we are not yet or will never be married to. It is more than just fulfilling and meeting a need or releasing lust. 

The seed of a man is valuable and has purpose. Seed not planted (comes forth by the millions) is not producing.  Thus it is wasted and God is not pleased (Gen 38:9,10). Because anything that is not doing what it is or was created to, serves no purpose. It is useless to creation and its advancement.  Remember the fig tree in Matthew 21 and the vine in John 15. In God's world which is the right way of doing things, EVERYTHING, even sex (in marriage) has a grand purpose. So, why not make this time(s) (with your spouse) grand?  This is where and how the mystery of the 2 becoming 1 happens - one in flesh and in spirit.

No longer see the intimate moments and times (with your spouse) as a duty or for selfish motives. Make her want you in worship. Draw him into you into  - through the new idea of worship. Cause your spouse to desire (more) worship...to hear God say, even in this, "Well done, thy good and faithful servants, you have been faithful over this little and I will make you ruler of much."... To hear Him say, to know...You served well.  You want more, worship more. It is worship and it pleases God. So, yes! "Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise and bless His Holy Name". I know that is too much for some of you but again, it is truth anyhow. And for me, who is single and waiting right; and a worshipper, this encourages me!

I was in worship the other day and the presence of God - His love, care, and tenderness was so overwhelming, I could not stand. I could not stop releasing tears and telling Him and Jesus how much I love and appreciate Him/Them. That is how your worship of, in and through intimacy (with your spouse and mine when he comes to find) can be. 

So many of us had and have it so wrong about what sex is for and about. You get this revelation and truth...intimacy (in to me you see) and sex in your marriage will take on a whole other view and approach. And for the singles; men and women, it should give you a desire to wait and wait right. Can you imagine the freedom of your intimacy when you know that what is done in agreement between (only) the two of you is God's will and desire for you? When your desire is to please God and your spouse before yourself? Preferring them above and before you. My, my, my...exponential...off the charts, out the root! Up up and away! 

I always say, animals (cows, horses and probably roaches) have sex. But only those created in God's image for His good pleasure can make love, and thus create Him who is Love.  Sex is to be enjoyed and carefully entered into through love (God) - in agreement (covenant) with His will and way. It is not like you are driving onto a car lot, picking a car you like, climbing in and test driving it; only to park it back on the lot - often not in the space you took it from with less power and or gas in it. It was not intended for use prior to marriage but after you say, "I do"; after you come in agreement (purchase) and take all the responsibility of it (pay the bill(s) - note, insurance, maintenance, etc.). Many, if not most of us have made and continued to make this mistake and wonder why after marriage, the sex drive/appetite/desire/response changes. Because you previously drove something that wasn't yours yet. When I purchase a car, I am clear if I am looking for new or used and if so how used - how many previous owners and how many miles. 

Excluding an illness, children who don't have structure and bedtime, work that exhausts you everyday, long days because you are a work-a-holic, financial issues because you live outside of your means or legitimate loss, just don't feel like it, going outside of the marriage to get satisfied...excluding all that...I encourage you to make adequate time for intimacy and sex with your spouse. Now remember men, for her it starts long before the bedroom and bed. And may I interject this, a number of these things existed when you were dating and "getting busy" all the time - none of that mattered, but now everything interferes. Ever wondered why?

Let me tell you, you can't expect to come into God's plan "doing it" your way and then asking Him to bless it for life. You left/leave a foothold for the enemy. God's Word says (paraphrasing), do not withhold sex from one another for lengths of time - except where you have both agreed and then for only a set time or else the enemy gets a foothold. So how do you (both) fix that? Repent (changing the way we think about and approach a thing to align with God's way) and ask God for forgiveness for not honoring His purpose and original intent for sex after marriage. Now, that you have asked for forgiveness and changed your mind about it and have the truth about it - do something and do something different...always in agreement. Now don't bring other people, animals, or dare I say porn into your haven, marriage bed and covenant. I earnestly believe, if you grab a hold of this, you won't need any of that. Those who are married, take back the intimacy of your marriage, obey the Word of Lord and as my Grandma would say, "Have fun at it!". (I loved that lady!)

To you who are single, you are now equipped with this knowledge and can begin to prepare yourself for HOLY matrimony. Get ready. Trust God that your intended spouse will come and will not delay. Make sure you are on one accord and expect - anticipate a blessed union and communion on your night of consummation. Let it be the start of an amazing love life and life of love.

Let our desire alway be to please God in every area of our lives and to give and bring Him glory, even in our intimacy with our spouse. (Rom 12:1,2)    

*Unless otherwise noted, all thoughts, expressions, quotes, etc. are the original words/creation/conceptions of #Dr. Tuesday.